Baltimore Kinetic Sculpture Race
2017 Race Report: Four from Jemicy School

The 3D Industrial Design Kinetic Sculpture Race Class at the Jemicy School in Baltimore County fielded another group of ACE-winning sculptures this year.

It featured an innovative center steering wheel, controlled by a non-propulsive standing pilot (who counts as a Barnacle because he did not help propel the craft, and since he rode the entire race and weighed at least 93 pounds, yielded a time bonus). This team completed all of the additional stringent rules throughout the racecourse required to win an ACE under the unceasing watchful eye of a dedicated ACE judge.

Since the waves were rougher than usual, roll stability became a concern; here the pilots lean to starboard as the port bow pontoon submerged. (They had enough foam on top to prevent the Pontoon Effect from causing a full capsize roll, however. Prospective Kinetinauts, take note!)

ACE pilots must make continuous progress through all obstacles. If they remain in the same spot for one minute, the countdown timer begins. This team was stuck, but their countdown went from 10 to only 8 before they broke free and were able to finish the mud.

ACE pit crew are permitted to touch the sculpture—but not give it any forward propulsion whatsoever, especially in the mud.

A proud team on its way to ACE.

Racers are encouraged to bribe Kinetic Kops during the race; there’s even an award. Jemicy’s 3-d printed kinetic chicken-winged coat of arms (shown here in the hands of Sister O’Blivion), meant Jemicy received the Best Bribes award.

With 4 pilots, Like Peas in a Pod featured a brimming central pod, and a well-placed pontoon at each corner. They also achieved ACE status throughout the race.

Since 2004, the Jemicy School has entered a colossal array of sculptures:

• 2016: Boogie Man, Cry Babies, Dragon Racer, Pocket Monster, Hydra, Math-lete, Flying Phoenix, Little Krach, and Ancient Hooptie
• 2015: Stripes, Safari Hon, Cheetah Cheetah Pumkin Eatah, and Snake Rattle & Roll
• 2014: Going for Ace of Cakes, Cake Boss, Takes the Cake, Icing on the Cake, Have Your Cake and Eat It Too, and It’s my Daddy’s Beemer and I’ll Cry if I Want To
• 2013: You Know the Drill, Hammer Time, and Gut Wrencher
• 2012: Traffic Jam, Jeepers, Going Postal, Hot Rod, and Keep On Truckin’
• 2011: Vechysvboat, Einherjar, Odin, Ve and Vidar, Buri, and Brunehilde
• 2010: Veke Versa Boat, Squid Man, Kraken, Cabrena Octopus & Calamari
• 2009: Critter, Lady Jaye, Low Rider Max, Sneaky Moose, and Philly Flyer
• 2008: Revelation, The Sneaky Moose, and Viscar Boot Attempt #3
• 2007: Valkin Visker Bote II, Daisy Pushers, Subdude
• 2006: Subdude and Dia de la Ardilla Muerta
• 2005: Big Baby, Gerbil & Chariot, and Viking & Moose
• 2004: Valking Viscar Boot

The single-pilot You Scream, Ice Cream! also achieved ACE, a cone with a cherry on top.

With narrower tires, this countdown got all the way to 1—in just a few more seconds the pilot would have lost her ACE.

Heavy winds also caused these two Jemicy sculptures to collide in the water.

The other single-pilot Jemicy entry was Doughnut Get in My Way. The hardest part of the racecourse to ACE is the water exit. Since most sculptures are rear-wheel drive, flotation can prevent traction to leave the water unassisted. After extended hard work, this pilot was able to crank his way out of the water to the cheers from the crowd and this enthusiastic crew member. The pilot went on to complete an ACE, adding 4 to the growing count for Jemicy.